Crumpled

1. Distribute a sheet of paper and pen to each person in your group.
2. Invite each person to focus on a particular experience that frustrates them, makes them angry or causes them concern.
3. In as few words as possible, ask each person to write this experience on their paper.
4. When ready, ask everyone to crumple the sheet of paper into a ball.
5. Immediately, or at a later point, ask each person to open the crumpled paper and flatten it as much as possible.
6. Using whatever pens, markers and/or craft materials you have available, ask each person to transform their paper into something new, eg add a doodle, colour it in, fold it into something, etc.
7. When ready, invite one or more members of your group to share what they created.
8. Invite your group to reflect on the process of reframing their experience.

Once I’ve described the basic setup, I’m sure you’ll imagine a bunch of really useful ways to vary this simple exercise to suit your purposes.

Distribute a sheet of paper with a pen/pencil to every member of your group.

Your framing will vary, but you want to leave your group with a prompt that invites them to write or draw their response onto the paper.

For example, you could ask your group to think of something that frustrates them or draw an object that reflects how they are feeling, etc.

Think carefully about what you will state or ask because it will influence the quality of the responses you evoke.

When ready, ask each person to gently crumple the paper in their hands. Not into a tiny crushed ball, but balled up in one’s hand.

At this point, you can then ask everyone to open their crumpled paper or leave as is and return to it at a later point in your program. Either way, ask each person to open and flatten the paper as best as they can.

Here’s the best bit.

Ask each person to create something new from or on this crumpled canvas. As just three examples, you could invite folks to colour in the paper, add a doodle, fold it into a paper plane, etc.

As you may already have worked out, the whole point of this exercise is to help people reframe their emotional response (to any sort of stimuli) in a more powerful and/or positive way.

For example, an individual can transform a plain sheet of paper with a description of something they are anxious about into a colourful mosaic of interest, eg see one such example below.

This exercise teaches us that even though we made a mistake, we can control our (emotional) response to it.

That is, there is something really powerful about the act of colouring in, or reimagining a feeling or emotion that our first impressions can take on a whole new life. These thoughts can be as self-reflective and/or as deeply meditative as one chooses.

As you can see, this exercise is wonderfully applied in programs that seek to build resilience, mindfulness and social-emotional learning skills.

With thanks to the team at Berry Street Educational Model who shared this powerful exercise with me during an online workshop in 2020.

Beware the inclination of some folks in your group to think of tossing their crumpled paper ball at someone at some point during the exercise.

You could integrate Crumpled as part of a well-designed SEL program to develop your group’s ability to understand their emotions, thoughts and values and how these influence behaviour in different situations.

Specifically, this activity offers ample opportunities to explore and practice the following social & interpersonal skills:

Self-Awareness

• Identifying Emotions
• Linking Feelings, Values & Thoughts
• Identifying Personal, Cultural & Linguistic Assets
• Recognising Strengths, Prejudices & Biases
• Demonstrating Self-Confidence, Honesty & Integrity
• Experiencing Self-Efficacy
• Having A Growth Mindset

Self-Management

• Controlling One’s Emotions
• Identifying & Managing Stress
• Demonstrating Self-Discipline & Self-Motivation

Relationship Skills

• Communicate & Listen Effectively
• Seeking and/or Offering Support
• Build Positive Relationships
• Demonstrate Cultural Competency

Responsible Decision-Making

• Demonstrating Curiosity & Open-Mindedness
• Identifying Problems
• Making Reasoned Judgements
• Identifying Solutions
• Anticipating & Evaluating the Consequences of One’s Actions
• Promoting Personal & Collective Well-Being

You can learn more about SEL and how it can support character education here.

Emotional Intelligence & Resilience

This is an ideal exercise to increase awareness of and build emotional competencies, especially resilience. Learning to let go, reframe experiences and rebound from difficult circumstances is a critical skill for successful living. Consider teaching this activity to your group early in their development so that they have access to a strategy to help them deal with difficult situations for the rest of their lives. It may start off as writing one’s concerns on paper, but with careful guidance, it can morph into a mental skill they can access when required.

Mindfulness

This self-reflective exercise is particularly useful when integrated into a program that develops mindful practices. When combined with dedicated mindful activities such as Calming Visualisations and Mindful Breathing, you will likely prepare your group more effectively for the types of reflection required to squeeze the most from this exercise.

• Guided Response: Instruct your group to adopt only one or two ways to transform their crumpled papers.
• Consider leading Islands of Healing Circle, Mindful Breathing or other self-reflective exercises to serve as a useful lead-in to this self-reflective exercise.
• Open the Virtual Adaptation tab to learn how to present this activity online.

• Ask each person involved in your virtual gathering to grab a sheet of paper and pens before you describe the activity. If necessary, you may wish to ask everyone to show their crumpled ball of paper in front of their webcam at the end before opening it up.
• Note, some attendees may prefer to switch off their webcam (maybe microphone, too?) during the creative process. Be sure to provide a precise time to ask everyone to switch their webcams on again.

It is really hard for most of us, in the moment, not to get caught up in the rage or tension or anxiety of a particular circumstance. In this next exercise, I’m going to ask you to consider one such experience, and then I’m going to teach you how to re-frame it so that you have greater control over it…

When I was young, my parents would tell me to count to ten before I said anything in response to a frustrating or negative experience. This wasn’t always easy, but I do admit that waiting the requisite 10 seconds did seem to change the way I viewed the situation I was facing. I’d like to teach you a different technique to enjoy the same benefits…

Coupled with one or more reflection strategies, here are some sample questions you could use to process your group’s experience after conducting this reflective exercise:

• On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest, describe the level of unpleasantness you felt when you wrote down your response on the paper.
• At the end of the exercise, did this level of unpleasantness increase or decrease?
• How difficult was it for you to reframe the experience?
• What assisted you most to reframe or view this experience differently?
• Do you think this exercise helped you in some way? How?
• What will help you remember to apply this strategy the next time you have a big feeling?