How to Encourage Quiet People to Talk

How to Encourage Quiet People to Talk

the Lazy Facilitator Episode 17

One of the most common questions I get from group facilitators worldwide is this: How do I get quiet people to talk or contribute?

Can you relate?

Here’s the first thing you need to know: stop pushing them.

The reality is, you cannot force people to participate. They need to be pulled in willingly.

Yes, this means you should always honour their choice, but that does not excuse a lack of effort on your part to encourage them.

So here are three strategies I use to create the right sort of environment to invite conversation (click play below:)

First, always invite sharing in the relative safety of pairs or small groups first. Public speaking is terrifying for many people. Small groups just feel safer.

Second, frame the sharing so everyone knows they can respond however they want, which might include nothing at all in the beginning. Give them permission to ease in.

And third, be patient. Humans are comfort-seeking machines.

Some of us just need more time before we feel comfortable enough to step into our stretch zone and lean in.